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Chapter 3 of 8

Christian Marriage Principles

Christian tradition views marriage as a sacred covenant— a reflection of Christ's love for the church. This framework offers profound guidance for sacrificial, enduring love.

Marriage as Covenant

In Christian teaching, marriage isn't just a contract (which can be broken) but a covenant—a sacred promise made before God that reflects His own faithfulness.

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Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.

Ephesians 5:25

The Christian model calls for sacrificial love—putting your spouse's wellbeing equal to or above your own. This applies to both partners in modern interpretation.

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Key Insight

The famous "love chapter" (1 Corinthians 13) isn't about romantic feelings—it describes love as patient, kind, not envious, not proud, not self-seeking. This is love as action, not emotion.

The 1 Corinthians 13 Standard

Apply this passage as a practical checklist:

  • Patient: Slow to anger, quick to understand
  • Kind: Actively good to your spouse
  • Not envious: Celebrating their successes
  • Not boastful: Humble about your own strengths
  • Not rude: Speaking with respect always
  • Not self-seeking: Their needs matter as much as yours
  • Not easily angered: Quick to calm, slow to rage
  • Keeps no record of wrongs: True forgiveness
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The Love Check

Rate yourself 1-10 on each quality from 1 Corinthians 13. No judgment—just awareness. Pick the lowest one to focus on this week.

Mutual Submission

Modern Christian scholarship emphasizes mutual submission in marriage—both partners yielding to each other in love:

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Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

Ephesians 5:21

This verse precedes the famous "wives submit" passage and frames it: the call is for mutual yielding, not one-sided dominance.

Practical Christian Marriage Wisdom

  • Pray together: Couples who pray together report higher satisfaction
  • Forgive as forgiven: Extend the grace you've received
  • Serve each other: Love expressed through action
  • Share spiritual life: Worship, study, grow together
  • Build on the rock: Shared faith as foundation
  • Keep your vows: Commitment through seasons
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The Prayer Practice

⏱️ 10 minutes daily
  1. 1Hold hands and take a moment of silence
  2. 2Each partner shares one thing they're grateful for today
  3. 3Each shares one thing they're struggling with
  4. 4Pray for each other aloud or silently
  5. 5End with a prayer for your marriage

Forgiveness: The Foundation

Christian teaching places radical forgiveness at the center. Jesus taught forgiving "seventy times seven"— meaning without limit. In marriage, unforgiveness creates walls that eventually destroy connection.

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Reflect on This

Is there an unforgiveness you're holding onto in your relationship? What would it take to truly release it?

Forgiveness isn't saying what happened was okay—it's freeing yourself from carrying the burden.

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Key Insight

Christian marriage wisdom centers on grace—extending to your partner the same unmerited love and forgiveness that you've received. This breaks cycles of criticism and contempt.

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